Me Time: Giving New Meaning to the phrase ‘self-centred’
Wife. Husband. Parent. Daughter. Son. Sibling. Friend. Employer. Employee. Cook. Cleaner. Bottom Wiper. Counsellor. The list could go on and on ...
But whar about you? Where does the Essential You fit into all this?
Most of my clients come to me feeling unhappy, burned out and guilty, having lost sight of themselves and their hopes and desires. But most of them also put themselves to the back of the queue when it comes to care. When challenged about this, they become immediately uncomfortable – any higher up the pecking order would be self-centred, wouldn’t it?
Let’s explore the meaning of being self-centred’. Society has taught us all that to be self-centred is to be conceited, to be selfish. Putting yourself first is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you consider yourself to be a ‘nice’ person, so let’s view ‘self-centred’ in a different way – in its true definition.
Putting YOU at the Centre
Rather than seeing your daily life as linear, with a hierarchy of priorities running from top to bottom, I’d like you to envisage your life as a wheel. See yourself as the hub in the centre, and your loved ones, work, and other elements of your life as end points on a spoke, which emanates from the hub, and forms the wheel around you.
Balance + Distance = the perfect combination
There are two parts to this wheel that are important. The first part is balance. Balance is required between the daily, outer elements of your life, by not giving too much of your time and attention to one thing as opposed to another. Not only that, balance is required between them and the centre hub – you, and the inner elements of your life. If there is no balance the wheel – your life – won’t work. Simple as that.
Take an objective look at your life now. Are you giving too much of yourself in certain areas of your day-to-day life and not others? Are you neglecting family and friends for work? How much time do you set aside each day to do something just for you?
How much do you really have left in the tank?
It’s vital that you make sure that you are not overstretched in one particular area of life, and that you give yourself the permission and the time to feed your soul, your innate sense of self. You can’t give to others if your own reserves are depleted, or you will end up reacting to situations and people from a place of anger, as your self-esteem shouts out ‘But what about me?’ Without time for proper self-care, you risk feeling resentment, depression or medicating yourself with unhealthy habits, such as overeating or drinking, as you attempt to ‘treat yourself’ in a different way.
Finding Your Thing, the Thing that Feeds Your Soul, and making time for it, will ensure you’re grounded, fulfilled and able to contribute to life with pleasure. You’re not self-centred. You’re your Self. Centred.
If you need help with getting your work/life balance right, or you’d like to explore ways to make your life a more fulfilling one, Dawn would love to hear from you. She has helped many clients find themselves and their passion and would love to speak to you if you need support.